Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Getting married because a baby is on the way


Before I start, I want to say that this is in no way, shape, or form intended to attack or pass judgment on anyone for their choices, and decisions in life. I respect everyone's choice, and decision to do what they think is best for them in their lives. Me sef I never marry, so I don't know what might happen in my future.

Ok, I've said that... now let's get to gist of the post.

Chinedu was toasting Bola just to play around, and was not looking for anything serious or long term. After some serious chasing, endless dates, and late night caking, Bola eventually allows Chinedu to "enter the place"...lol. Well, the day she agreed, my guy didn't have a condom with him cos Bola had been doing shakara for so long that he really didn't think it will ever happen. Of course this golden opportunity was not going to be passed up for any reason... Lai Lai o. Today nah today... It must happen this night...lol. Bola trusted Chinedu was disease-free (big assumption), and he felt the same way about her, so my guy decided to enter the river with no clothes on, and swim like that was the last river he'll ever swim in. Fast forward a couple of weeks, and Chinedu was sleeping when he got the late text... that "I think I'm late" text. Chei... Yawa don gas o. What to do... and Bola nah pastor pikin, and her father doesn't even play that at all. Abortion is not an option, so what next? Marriage?

Let's not fool ourselves. Couples getting married because a child is on the way is not anything new, or a new trend going on in our generation. Some of our parents either got married, or accelerated their wedding process because of an unplanned pregnancy. In Nigeria, and Africa in general, due to our "High Moral Standards", it is frowned upon to even think about having children outside of wedlock, so if you carry belle`, or you drop your seed in someone then you better be ready to spend your life with this person. Sometimes it works out for the best, and other times it's down right disastrous.

In a couple of cases I know, the couple were in a long steady relationship that was headed for marriage already and so they just said... "hey, why not?", and it ended up working for them, but in some other cases the couple barely had a relationship going, and with time began to resent each other, blame themselves for making such a rash decision, and in some extreme cases look at the child as the one that started the whole fiasco.

So here's the question. Guys, will you get married to a girl you got pregnant for the sake of the baby? Girls, would you want to get married to a guy just because he got you pregnant?

All this is assuming there is no abortion, or rape and the couple (most times the woman) has decided to keep the baby.

via jaguda.com

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